banner

Avengers: Infinity War – Top 10 Fake Spoilers

In an attempt to release a movie so huge it’ll give each fan his very own heart attack, Disney has crammed every single hero from the Marvel Cinematic Universe into one (okay, two) giant film(s). To prepare for the only film with a call sheet longer than its running time, check out the following fake spoilers for Avengers: Infinity War

10 – Let’s admit it, it’s kind of nice to see a Hemsworth in pain.

9 - Thanos's primary motivation: Conquer the Universe. Secondary motivation?: Bedazzle his Gauntlet.
9 – Thanos’s primary motivation: Conquer the Universe.
Secondary motivation?: Bedazzle his Gauntlet.

8 - Only one of these three actors has a "I'm getting back end box office points" smile on their face. Can you guess who?
8 – Only one of these actors has a “I’m getting box office points” smile on his face. Can you guess which one?

7 - You know the drill, Ruffalo. You get 15 minutes of exposition in the sport coat then it's torn pants and green skin for the rest of the film.
7 – You know the drill, Ruffalo. You get 15 minutes in the sport coat then it’s torn pants and green skin for acts 2 & 3.

(more…)

title-card

A Wrinkle in Time – Top 10 Fake Spoilers

Was anyone else assigned A Wrinkle in Time in middle school but couldn’t remember the plot if your life depended on it? Well fear not because it’s hitting the big screen on March 9th. To get you ready for this trip down faded memory lane, check out these fake spoilers:

10 - Disney introduces kids not only to the fantasy world of Madeleine L'Engle's writing but also their first acid trip.
10 – Disney introduces kids not only to the fantasy world of Madeleine L’Engle’s writing but also their first acid trip.

9 - Greatest suspension of disbelief required for Wrinkle in Time: Buying Chris Pine as an astrophysicist.
9 – Greatest suspension of disbelief required for Wrinkle in Time? Buying Chris Pine as an astrophysicist.

8 - Oprah's newest favorite thing: PLATINUM HAIR WEAVES!
8 – Oprah’s newest favorite thing: PLATINUM HAIR WEAVES!

8 - Every journey to save the universe starts with a spin through Wisteria Lane to check in with the Desperate Housewives from Hell
7 – Every journey to save the universe starts with a spin through Wisteria Lane to check in with the Desperate Housewives from hell.

(more…)

logo-7

Top 5 Fake “Black Panther” Spoilers

Marvel’s first film of 2018 is all queued up so check out these fake spoilers…

We've all had that dream where we show up to our village completely naked.
5 – We’ve all had that dream where we show up to our village one morning completely naked.

4 - Like the best superhero movies, Black Panther teaches us to be afraid of all first-responders.
4 – Like the best superhero movies, Black Panther teaches us to be afraid of all first-responders.

(more…)

logan

Logan’s Travels with Charley (and Wolver-tween): Yes, No, Maybe

(Spoilers? Just some mild ones, bub.)

Yes, it’s good to see Wolverine in action again. Pairing him with a mini-me (or mini-him… er, actually a female mini-him) smelled like a big fat gimmick upon first glance (or whiff) but Wolver-tween is interesting, entertaining… and jarring. Seeing her decapitate an enemy was oddly refreshing. Why?

(more…)